Let’s Go On An Emotional Roller Coaster Ride

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Help Find A Cure For Liver Cancer

I’ve always kept a positive attitude when it comes to my emotions, no matter what the situation is. Like most people I’ve experienced a lot of hills and valleys. But no matter what’s going to happen, what‘s currently happening or events that have happened I’ve always held steadfast to the belief that my life is going to get better.

This belief system has worked well for me for the better part of my life until the past thirty days or so,
Fathers  Day 2013 6
There are many stages dealing with a terminal disease. They include (and not in any order) anger, sadness, loss of interest in normal activities, fatigue, plus many others. Just getting me to the laptops and iPads almost takes an act of Congress and we all know how well things are working in D.C.

I’m currently in the deeply sad stage and because I’m not familiar with it I set an appointment with The UCSD Palliative Care. Their suggestion is to see a either a psychologist or a psychiatrist. I chose the psychologist because they don’t subscribe pills. I’m currently taking 20 pills daily and I’m tired of all the multi- colored, multi- shaped “magic pills.” and their side effects. Ooooh, those side effects, where do th

ey get those things?

Does it sound like I’m giving up? To some I’m sure it does but trust me when I say I’m not giving up. I want to live as long as I possibly to spend as much time as I can with my sons.Bill Diana Peter

I feel like I owe my readers an apology for this blog as it’s tone is dark but right now that’s I feel. I’m sure that things will change especially when I get to spend time with my boys this week.

Thanks everyone for your continued support. Tomorrow will be a better day.

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18 thoughts on “Let’s Go On An Emotional Roller Coaster Ride

    • Thank each and every one of you for your deep felt messages. The Power of Community shows it’s power once again. Medically nothing has changed but spiritually my heart has been filled once again. Thanks for for your prayers, positive thoughts and your collective strength and wisdom.

      Bill

    • Thank each and every one of you for your deep felt messages. The Power of Community shows it’s power once again. Medically nothing has changed but spiritually my heart has been filled once again. Thanks for for your prayers, positive thoughts and your collective strength and wisdom.

      Bill

  1. You can have your dark moments. What do we need to do to help you find some lighter ones?Virtual hugs and xxxs and enjoy your time with the boys this week.

    • Thank each and every one of you for your deep felt messages. The Power of Community shows it’s power once again. Medically nothing has changed but spiritually my heart has been filled once again. Thanks for for your prayers, positive thoughts and your collective strength and wisdom.

      Bill

  2. Bill,
    Just a few hours ago I was talking to Ed Kless on the phone today and we both said, “I haven’t heard from Bill in a few weeks, we need to check on him.”

    What you’re feeling is completely normal. Of course your sad and mad that your energy is zapped and you feel like crap. The fact that you can talk about it and acknowledge how you feel is really healthy and will help you get thru those stages quicker when you do. Being with your boys this weekend will help. Go to the beach, be outdoors, do anything that sounds good to you even if that means you all lay on your bed and watch a movie. Just be together and be present. savor the moments you have.

    You have an army of friends who love you and are walking beside you holding you up. Keep looking up, allow yourself to feel all the emotions and reach out to your firiends and family whenever you need them. Terminal cancer is a roller coaster ride but you don’t have to be on the ride alone.

    Love you Bill!

    • Thank each and every one of you for your deep felt messages. The Power of Community shows it’s power once again. Medically nothing has changed but spiritually my heart has been filled once again. Thanks for for your prayers, positive thoughts and your collective strength and wisdom.

      Bill

  3. I know sadness is uncharted territory for you, Bill. I hope you aren’t in that neck of the woods for long and so glad you’ve sought assistance. You’re one tough dude, even if you don’t feel like it every day. ❤ Healing and soothing hugs – Rhonda

    • Thank each and every one of you for your deep felt messages. The Power of Community shows it’s power once again. Medically nothing has changed but spiritually my heart has been filled once again. Thanks for for your prayers, positive thoughts and your collective strength and wisdom.

      Bill

  4. Sadness happens. If you didn’t talk about it here, your blog would be a different, lesser quality. Your psychologist will probably tell you something along the lines of, “Embrace the sadness to acknowledge its full roots. Then do some physical things, preferably outside and with people you enjoy. Not only does the activity change your brain chemicals positively, but the activity-with-people helps keep you in the moment, a healthier place for you now.

    Thank you for your comments on your journey. They do help me with my challenges. I hope you have a great time with your kids this weekend!

    • Thank each and every one of you for your deep felt messages. The Power of Community shows it’s power once again. Medically nothing has changed but spiritually my heart has been filled once again. Thanks for for your prayers, positive thoughts and your collective strength and wisdom.

      Bill

  5. Bill,

    My 9 year old daughter asked about you yesterday morning. She asked if I had talked to you lately, so I will be calling you again soon. My whole family is praying for you.

    • Thank each and every one of you for your deep felt messages. The Power of Community shows it’s power once again. Medically nothing has changed but spiritually my heart has been filled once again. Thanks for for your prayers, positive thoughts and your collective strength and wisdom.

      Bill

  6. Make no mistake, your emotions are real. Sadness, depression, anxiety…these are a part of life, as are happiness, joy, peace…to the degree you have known one, you can experience the other. It sounds like you have had many happy times as well. My prayers are with you.

    • Thank each and every one of you for your deep felt messages. The Power of Community shows it’s power once again. Medically nothing has changed but spiritually my heart has been filled once again. Thanks for for your prayers, positive thoughts and your collective strength and wisdom.

      Bill

  7. Bill, my prayers and best wishes be with you. Nothing wrong with being sad but know that you are loved by many and there are people praying and pulling for you. Feel no shame in leaning on our strength when you need to.

  8. Praying without ceasing Bill, have a pic of you and your boys in my prayer journal.

    H……….Holding
    O……….On with
    P……….Patient
    E……….Expectations

    H……….He…….(Jesus)
    O……….Offers
    P……….Peace
    E……….Everyday

    Love, Gail

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